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The next morning (or even that night) come the recriminations: Was it wrong to give that person the sexual green light when you had no intention of rekindling the emotional side of the relationship?Marilyn, a 57-year-old single colleague of mine, recently reconnected with someone she had worked with many years ago. "No," Marilyn said with a laugh, "it's better than that: I'm in like with him — and that's exactly where I want to be." She further confided that they planned to make their reunions "a regular thing — if four times a year can be called 'regular.' But I think that's about all I really want." Marilyn's casual approach to maintaining a friendship with benefits typifies the mindset of older folks who have reconciled themselves to having "great fun" even if it's "just one of those things." And episodic pleasure-seeking may be more common than you think: In The Normal Bar, a book I wrote last year with Chrisanna Northrup and James Witte, we reported that 61 percent of female survey respondents who had partners fantasized about someone they had met.He was a wonderful father—and on some level, I recognize I cut him off when he showed me he was human. Each of us is a writhing mass of contradictions, PH.We all have public personas and private personas, and there are always gaps between the two. That he failed as a husband and hurt your mom—with an assist from laws criminalizing sex work—is another of your father's truths.Forget classified personals, speed dating, or other Longview dating sites or chat rooms, you've found the best!Here's where you can meet singles in Lansing, Michigan.Many older divorced or widowed men and women are in the same boat. You're probably not desperate enough to stalk your neighbors, or to go looking for friends with benefits in all the wrong places (bars come to mind).They feel protective of their privacy and peace of mind, but they haven't become eunuchs or hermits. But offered a chance to reconnect with someone from your past — dinner with your high school steady, for example — you might just surprise yourself by winding up in bed.

"Don't book the church yet, Mom — it was just a hookup!

A few years ago, my dad was busted by the cops for using an online forum to solicit escorts.

The arrest and infidelity destroyed his marriage to my mom. I know part of my anger comes from how badly he hurt my mom. But because my dad was involved in this bust, and because I had to become aware of the double life he led, I felt uncomfortable around him.

For 50-plus types unwilling to walk — possibly rewalk — the path that leads to romance, rings and relocation, the prospect of a "friend with benefits" is looking less and less like a millennial indulgence.

After all, it gets awfully lonely waiting around for "the one." Perhaps you've decided that what you need at this point in your life is someone to talk to and laugh with — someone with whom you can share the sheets, but not the tax refund.

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